To Love and To Reason
by kishi.tenshi
Summary: I need someone to take care of me...
1. Chapter 1

**To Love and To Reason**

A Naruto Fan Fiction Story

* * *

**Starring:**

_**Uzumaki Naruto**_

_**Subaku no Temari**_

_**Uchiha Sasuke**_

_**Haruno Sakura**_

_**Nara Shikamaru**_

_**Yamanaka Ino**_

_**There no such person as insensitive,**_

_**It's just that there are people **_

_**Who don't want to hurt,**_

_**Don't want to be hurt**_

_**Or**_

_**Pretend not to be hurt.**_

* * *

**Chapter 1:****Rejected...Again**

It was a long night, a very meaningful night for him, and maybe for her. They both lie on the grassy floor of their old training ground. The place is perfect, the rustling leaves are their music, and the beautiful moonlit sky is their source of joy.

A blonde shinobi crossed his legs, while lying flat on his back and his hand on his nape serving as his pillow. He switches his gazes on both on the sky and on the kunoichi beside him. He stare at the full moon longer, trying hard to fight the tints of red that's starting to show on his cheeks not only because of the **presence** of that **someone** whom he swears to protect all his life, but also because of what he'll say to her. He picture her walking on the aisle, approaching him wholeheartedly, how he wishes that that day will come since it's been three years that they've been in such a mutual relationship that anybody would look at them thoughtfully, thinking the same way as his. He closes his eyes as he continues on dreaming on that day to come, if that is.

She admits to herself that this night is something so meaningful, yes, today is what she calls victory, victory over her war with herself. For about a half a year, she's been arguing with herself regarding her feelings to that **someone** whom she shares this night with, whether she shares the same romantic feelings with him or just closeness that is unbreakable. She closes her eyes as she tilted her body slowly to face the shinobi beside her. She started to talk with herself again.

_I don't want to lose you._

The blonde took notice of the kunoichi's movement, then took a long deep breathe, as he tries to contemplate all the things he wanted to say to her. Then his mouth open slightly, trying his best to tell her everything he have inside him, in his mind and in his heart. How he wishes that those butterflies in his stomach stops jittering, that he may relax and to say the right words on that very moment.

_I must tell her everything now, before it's too late!_

She lifts her torso up and kneels, her eyes still close. She opens her eyes, her emerald orbs started to watch closely the blue orbs that for everyday makes her complete. She felt that same beating rhythms on her chest, pounding harder every time her skin touches his. Then she felt a warm touch lay on her hand, she blushes a little but hide it quickly by her bangs swaying freely with the warm breeze. At that moment, the words that she longs to hear but despises a lot started to ring in her head.

"Sakura…" he whispered, but audible enough between the two of them. The kunoichi stared at the blonde shinobi for a moment, he quickly sit upright with an Indian seat pose not removing his stare from her emerald orbs.

"Naruto… what is it?" she asks, she knows, she feels what could he be saying at that very moment. She just hopes that she can change the subject only to evade the topic that they're leading to.

"I… uhm… I really need to say this to you." He stammered which makes Sakura giggle inside. She could see it clearly that her best friend or special friend's face is starting to redden. She sighed as she listen to him intently, telling him voicelessly that she's waiting for him to continue. All she receives is his nearing face, his hot breathe touching her skin, and his fingers caressing her face, and at that moment, he started to speak.

"You know how much… how… much… I love … I love you… right?" he stammered, but still trying to make that awkward distance between their faces remain, and he receives a nod of an agreement as an answer.

"Well, if that so… (inhaled deeply)… since we're already 23, and a shinobi's life is way too short compared to ordinary ones… will you… marry… me?" then it came out. Those words that a lady would like to hear from their loved ones started to echo in the air. How she wish she could say yes, but the moment that it just felt so right, is exactly the moment that she felt like he don't deserve someone like her. She is a weakling, that's the way she sees herself, especially when she reminisce the past missions that they work on together, that almost failed because of her, all because of her weakness.

"Naruto… are you sure?" she asks, trying to evade answering that question that she just wishes to answer easily.

"What's with that question? Of course I am so sure of that! And I promise that I…" he stopped by those soft fingers of her laid flatly on his lips. Her eyes are teary, and he can't figure out whether she's happy or not, and that confuses him a lot.

"I still love him Naruto, I'm sorry." She said bravely, finally, she just said those words that her heart trying to hold back, but her brains are just better than her heart. She felt like that that piece of her is breaking down, especially when she felt hot liquids flowing to her fingers that stopped the blonde from speaking.

"Why? Why Sakura? Tell me! It's been years since he left, why you can't get over him! What's with him that I don't have!" he started to asks, and he's weeping in front of her. He just wanted a valid reason why does she have to turn him down like that.

"Because, I still love him Naruto. Can't you get it?" she whispered, though her tears are starting to flow down her cheeks and it's visible from the blue orbs of her favorite comrade.

"That's it! Look, I really hate to say this, but who's with you all this time Sakura!! It's me and no one else! Then why can't you choose me over him! I've done my best for you, I risk my life for you, but did he do that to you? Does he love you like I do? Answer me please, Sakura! A very reasonable one, that if ever you convinced me that you still love him all this time, I promise, I will never bother you again, that's a promise for a lifetime." He said it, his heart is tearing into pieces, and he's grieving. Being a Hokage is just one step ahead of him, the council already bet him as a very good candidate to be Konoha's leader, but one thing that he could not get is, the very first dream he wants to have, is still the same dream he can't achieve, that is to have the pink-haired kunoichi to be his wife.

"Look Naruto, if you have to love someone, you don't need to reason why. I learn to love him for all of these years that even me can't comprehend the reasons. I just felt my heart beating fast whenever I think of him, and to tell you the truth, I still dream of him every night. And if ever he comes back with or without your help, I'll still accept him, with no regrets, and with no hesitation. I just hope you find that someone that will make you complete." She answered, all of those are lies, but she doesn't care if her heart is torn into pieces, all she wanted is to make this very special friend of her happy not in her arms, but onto others.

"But you are the **only one who makes me COMPLETE!**" he almost shouted, only to be answered with more tears from her eyes.

"I thought we are already in this relationship Sakura, a very special kind of friendship that's just the two of us can understand. I thought that you love me…" he continued, his head bowed down as he started to lie down again, wiping off his tears by his arm.

"I love you Naruto, but only as a brother." She answered flatly, as she put a hand on her chest to stop that hurtful beating in her heart.

"As a brother? Then why did you let me kiss you on your lips? Why did you let me hug you for a long time? Why are you not bored when we're just sitting here without saying anything? Why Sakura?" he asks endlessly again, hoping that she changes her statement but…

"Because I thought I was over him…" she said as tears never stopped from flowing.

"And you just said about a half year ago that you're moving on!" he whines, irritated on the fact that he can't be loved by someone like her

"Yes, that's the point Naruto, I'm just moving on! I never said I was over him!" she blurted out, that's the only way she could do to release all the hurt she felt inside.

"Moving on and getting over, what's the difference!" he shouted, good thing they were the only ones on the site.

"Because on moving on, you still have hesitations on forgetting him, you still hope that he'll pull you back to be in his arms again, but on getting over, you've decided that you'll forget him and the love for him will be gone forever. Get it?" she explains, hoping that this conversation would end up soon.

"Then tell me why did you let me kiss you." He said coldly, trying to decipher everything they've been through together alone.

"Look Naruto, stop being an idiot over me. There's still some one out there who will love you, the way I love him." How she loathe herself from doing such a hurtful thing to him…

"answer me." He insists, knowing that behind those tears are reasons that he must not give up on waiting for her to love him.

"Naruto, I already answered you." She said flatly, trying her best to end the conversation at that point

"Answer me."

"**Because, sometimes, it's not love, sometimes we've just become so attached that we've developed a need for each other. Just a NEED, not love. But, we're just too scared to admit it, even to ourselves, because we know that if we do, we might lose each other that actually give a damn about our life**." That's it, finally, she reasoned out, as she saw a smile curving the blonde's lips. She stops crying, as well as him. They both stared at each other for a while, then she stand up, and dusted off her clothes.

"You're going?" he asks, his voice is just the same, and emotionless.

"Hai, it's already late at night, I'm on duty tomorrow morning." She answered, as she started to walk, but Naruto stops her with a hug, an embrace with full meaning that only the two of them understands.

"Arigatou." He whispered right to her ear, and hug her tighter, and then let go. He pasted his old foxy grin on his face, trying to tell her speechlessly that he's alright.

"For what?" she asks, she is totally confused from his sudden reaction.

"Because you still love me, even higher than I wanted." He said as he rubs his nose and put his thumbs up. This made Sakura flung her arms to him…

"Arigatou. I thought you will not accept me after what I've said…" she said as she weeps in joy/sadness.

"Why will I do that? You are my loving SISTER Sakura-chan!" he said as she releases him from her 'brotherly hug'.

"Konbanwa Naruto, you better go now. You still have meetings with the council tomorrow." She said as she pushes him gently, and he started to sprint while waving his hands to her, and saying goodnight to her too.

_If only I could be as strong as you are, I will never hesitate to say yes Naruto. Aishiteru Naruto, but today, I must set you free, for you don't belong to a weakling's arms, you belong to someone who could take care of you, something that I can't do._

* * *

_**Sometimes I must hold back my feelings**_

_**Not because I'm afraid of falling for the person**_

_**But because that person has always been meant for**_

_**DREAMING**_

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: ** Vengeance and of Hope…

* * *

_--whatever the heart yearns for, it's what the hands would do—_

* * *

_Tomorrow, the plan would be executed…_

Onyx eyes stared at the stoned wall of his prison cell as the warden took off his shackles on his feet and on his hands. He looks indifferently at the ANBU waiting just at the exit of his room…

_Patience, Uchiha…. _

_**Patience…**_

--oooo--

"Tomorrow, there would be an important mission that I want you to do, Uzumaki…" the lazy tone of the Rokudaime echoed at the room, in which for some instances made the blonde rolled his eyes in irritation of being given an already told notice…

"I know Hokage-sama, I know what I would do, I know…" as he clenches and unclenches his fist to gain relaxation…

"I've heard what happened yesterday night…" as he took off his rather large straw hat to reveal his masked-face with eyes, trying not to show any kinds of emotion as not to offend his apprentice much further…

"And I promise that wouldn't affect my mission Kakashi…" as he sighed again, trying to keep his face strong enough, enough not to show any kind of weakness…

"Do you want to talk about it?" as he give him an interested look, staring at him eye to eye, and hope that he'll say yes, for whatever reason, his conscience started to ring in his ears, saying that he has to be a good friend for his apprentice…

"If I wouldn't bring any inconvenience Kakashi…" as the master of masks breaks down…

--oooo--

_**Is this what you really wanted Sasuke??**_

His eyes closed painfully which gives his ANBU escorts' attentions, and never averted their gazes away from him.

_I want revenge…!_

He regained his calmness for not giving any kinds of curiosity to arise on the three of them, though he knew that wouldn't happen…

_**Why revenge Sasuke?**_

He stopped on his tracks as he stared to nothing in particular, space-out…

"Move" a commanding voice of a female broke his trance and started walking again…

_I would bring our family's honor, and that's a promise that I gave to myself long ago…_

The pleasing warmth of the sun touches his pale skin as he was directed to the exit of the prison, oh, how he longed to feel such things again…

_After bringing our honor, we would be regaining our clan again, yes and make the Senju know who are the Uchihas, that we are the strongest…. The greatest…_

_**And by getting revenge you'll regain our clan's honor?**_

For the second time, he halted again, scanning the surroundings as he eyed the curious, some glares, and some indifferent looks of the other shinobis. He smirks, he knew at this point of time, he should be acting carefully that whatever plot he had in mind, must be executed at the right moment, at the right time…

--oooo--

"I should have known before that she would say no…" as he tried his best to keep himself from crying… "I should have just let go of her the moment she said that she wouldn't change her love for the teme, but as always, a dobe will always be a dobe" and wipe off a stray tear in his left eye…

"Sounds like Neji-kun, ne Naruto?…" trying to make the sorrowful voice turn into a teasing one, in which for some ways, made the blonde show the littlest of his smile…

"Know what Kakashi…" as he inhaled deeper than usual, more than his usual sigh

"What?" as a curious look grace on his brows and somewhat made it 'visible' behind his mask…

"Maybe, she's just too perfect for me, right?" and stifled an unconvincing laugh that made the Rokudaime set another one of those inquisitive glares towards him.

"Hn. Whatever Naruto, but all I wanted to bring back that lively ol' fella!" as he taps him on the back and gave him a good glance that signifies his approval of his apprentice's sound mind…

_Yup, too perfect to be my wife, but perfect enough to be my sister…_

--oooo--

The mahogany door opened up as a young woman appeared to welcome the upcoming notorious Uchiha with teary eyes and a reddening nose due to unceasing crying from last night.

_Don't back down now Haruno Sakura, you deserve him because you're weak… weak… weak…_

A man with onyx eyes entered the room together with the two ANBU walking beside him. He took a glance to the woman approaching him and scrutinized her features….

_**Many things have changed Sasuke, why can't you like any of these changes?**_

She elicited a small smile so as to welcome the old teammate back, yes back.

_Sakura, Sakura, Sakura, how can't I forget you?_

She extended a hand and placed it on the reddened wrist of his. A jolt of electric currents entered his system, and how can that be?

_**You missed them Sasuke, didn't you? You even wish that they were here, right?**_

_Say your prayers Konoha, say it like a mantra, says it before all of you die!!_

Another one of those sorrowful looks materialize on her usually beaming face, and how did it affect him so??

_Kneel on me Konoha, for from this day on, you'll regret it that you keep me alive…_

_**Why can't you see Sasuke, they're here to welcome you, she's here to welcome you…**_

_Say your prayers, KONOHA!_

--oooo--

Kakashi felt this tug in his heart whenever he sees his apprentice with such a lonesome face. It tugs his heart painfully when those grins that could lighten up every one's mood would turn into a scowl. It tugs his heart painfully, distractingly, whenever he realizes that when his students were younger and when they were still genin, he just sued him off like he was just one of the props. How could he forget such a being, such a wonderful persona that was suppose to be an eye catcher for all of the Hi no Kuni, would be just like parsley on the plate in his point of view?

That's why Kakashi – Rokudaime Hokage, never let any opportunity to pass when it comes to this loving student. He never let him train by himself again or let him knew new jutsus by himself, because as a teacher, he must always be there for him and for her. He even never let a single tear fall down from their eyes, without him being there to hear the reason of breaking down. And lastly, never did he let his eyes off from them –Naruto and Sakura -, yes, not even a single second, never again, because a teacher, and a jounin leader of the team must be true to his nindo – "No one dies in my team."

Kakashi may not know it, but Naruto, especially him, appreciate his hardships on reaching out to them. Naruto even admired him more, and even believe even more that he's really is a genius, with or without the Sharingan. Naruto believed that Rokudaime Hokage Hatake Kakashi is a perfect ninja besides his past. It's really a wonder, how Kakashi became a father-like figure for the two of them, though Kakashi comes to the point of despising his own father – Sakumo – and being orphaned in such a young age. It's a wonder to Naruto how Kakashi realizes things in the earliest times before he could ever make himself regret anything that he mistakenly do. That's why all Naruto could think about Kakashi are three things – a perfect ninja, a perfect sensei, and a perfect pervert… So much for team Kakashi anyways…

--oooo--

She could hear the baritone voice of the Uchiha from afar. She seats at the far side of the court room as he announces his pledge of loyalty back to Konoha. It's really the most disgusting thing she could ever imagine, and even more sickening to act like she still cared…

"_Sakura, you've got a mission…" the Godaime Hokage announced in a much more secluded area than her office…_

"_Shishou, what may that be?" like any genius and book smart lady she is; her jade eyes stared directly at the olive ones of her master, predicting that the mission is an elevated S-rank mission…_

"_For three months, Sasuke would be imprisoned, and I want you to be his watcher." Eyes looked at her with slight curiosity of whether she would agree or not, but still hoping that she wouldn't do either…_

"_To be his watcher, because he is the great Uchiha Sasuke, right, shishou?" she asks, hoping that she could ever have any option of backing down, and that's the first time, Haruno Sakura became dumb of reading her teacher's expressions showed in her eyes.._

"_If you wouldn't like to do so, I would just assigned Ino for this matter…" she said, because, if ever she presses on with the issue of the Uchiha's greatness, the long-lost secret of her teacher would be very destructive for the whole shinobi corps and of the whole village to be known especially to her. She even considered Naruto, but as far as her mind is concern, there are only two people that is capable of accomplishing this mission, either Sakura or Ino, but Sakura is still the better candidate…_

_She lowered her head and somehow found the wooden floor rather interesting. She contemplated at the matter. When she thinks of Ino, she remembers how her best friend/riva cried at the lost of Asuma, just for the retrieval of the Uchiha bastard and she wouldn't dare put her blonde friend back to that forlorn state just because of accepting this mission. _

_If she'll accept the mission, then she knows that she could do it without a sweat, only problem is how could she say this to Naruto – her boyfriend – in a way that he would understand, in a way that he wouldn't be hurt?_

She stood up in front of the judge and gave him the letter from the Godaime. Tsunade might not be in the position as the village's leader, but still have the power to assign jounins for ex-convicts, and that was done in secret with the current Hokage, the ninja assigned and the judge working on the case…

The judge look at her square in the eye and found nothing, and with the nod of the head did he dismiss her and the Uchiha, leading the freeman-to-be, back to his new cell which is far more comfortable from the usual ones. Acting like the same fan girl she used to be, she ask him the usual questions –how are you?, what do you want to eat?, and etc.-and as always, he answered with a usual groan, and that made her angry for a while, made her want to end the mission right then and there.

"_I'll take it." as her voice rang into the room with hesitation but it's enough for the Godaime to sign the seal though a loud gulp could be heard after the signing was done._

_She really never knows when did she planned to regain that fan girl attitude nor did she ever remember that she said yes on the mission, but only thing that happened to wake her up to this kind of blossoming nightmare is the voice of the Sandaime's grandson, a personal ANBU assigned by the Rokudaime for the Godaime._

"_Are you really that insensitive?" he asks though his face covered with mask, his voice was filled with resentment as she looks at her who is starting to hold her tears from falling down._

"_How would you know what I feel Konohamaru? You know very much clearly about him, and how he could be a threat for the village, so I'm doing this for the village!" as determine as she would want it to be, but it still sounds like she's convincing herself…_

"_She let you choose nee-san!! She let you choose but you still agree!!" he whines trying to make it clear to her what could be the possible consequences that would greatly affect her relationship with Naruto._

"_I am not insensitive as you think I am Konahamaru-kun, I am doing this for the village. Anyways, he's not the only one that would be hurt in this situation, so do I! But one must understand, he must understand, it's a mission, and you know when it comes to mission, he wouldn't argue with it…." And then clenching her fists to avoid the tears to keep on falling…_

"_Now I know I am so wrong to ask you to give him a chance. It's my entire fault, how could I let him not realize that you're just using him as a pawn for your senseless little chessboard to make your life not that boring. How couldn't I saw this coming, how could I trust you of being with him when all of the things you could do is to break his heart, nothing more, cause you're just too weak to stand up on your own feet!!" and with that did he receive the greatest punch that he could ever imagine from the monstrous strength of the pink-haired kunoichi…._

A tear fall from her left eye and then followed by another one until she found herself crying and forgotten that she's with the Uchiha. Now she understands…

--ooooo--

FIN

--ooooo--


End file.
